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The Cadena Nacional: Season 07, Episode 18

By | [email protected] | May 13, 2015 11:29am

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Yay! It’s a new episode of the Cadena Nacional this week, and loyal viewers will appreciate a return to the roots.

In yesterday’s message, President Cristina Fernández de Kirchner came back to her usual antics of publicly shaming people who disagree with her and warning about a “world that’s falling apart”. Because nothing works better for boosting rabid nationalism than warning about foreign threats.

She talked about Iraq, the vulture funds, Spain and the current collective bargaining process, that seems destined to become a lengthy one since the Government and unions are not in agreement about it at all.

She also criticized us, the media, for sucking. And let’s be honest, we do suck a lot. Admit it, we’re always focusing on the bad things, like corruption, hypocrisy and double-standards of the political class while we incessantly fail to report on the sheer awesomeness of Cristina’s administration.

But fret not, because Cristina has an antidote to all that negativity, and she told everyone about it today.

Enjoy.

And now some highlights from the Cadena, for the lazy viewers.

  • Today’s Cadena was about signing a debt extension agreement with the provincial authorities.
  • But then came the bonus track, in which she reminds everyone of what an epic battle the Kirchnerite fort is fighting on all fronts since according to them the entire world is out to get them. Let’s start with the press.
  • “When I read the papers every morning, I have an antidote. You read the papers and it sounds like you’re in Iraq, at war, it’s like you’re waiting for a missile to hit you at some point”. Well, somebody at the Casa Rosada is not doing their job properly. True, if you read Clarín or La Nación it does indeed sound like things are pretty bleak and we live in North Korea. But come on, man. Why aren’t staffers bringing Cristina the other papers out there? I mean, if you grab Página/12 or Tiempo Argentino it really does sound like we’re all living in Utopia. A Utopia where whoever doesn’t like the Government is part of a global conspiracy to topple the administration, but Utopia nonetheless. Why do you guys do this to the President? Somebody needs to tell her that there’s more “press” out there and that when she talks about “the press” being so negative she sounds like she’s conveniently ignoring other administration-friendly media outlets.
  • Maybe I should have ended my previous bulletpoint with “/end sarcasm”, in case I wasn’t clear.
  • “But there has to be some good news out there. And everyday they send me a little thing with good news to keep me going”. Ah, there we go! That’s her antidote. The good news exist, it appears. Unfortunately she makes it sound like you need to grab a machete, enter the haunted forest and clear the evil Clarín weeds out of the way in order to finally reach a copy of Tiempo Argentino, when in reality you can just go to the kiosko and get it. Don’t bring your machete, though.
  • Regarding the country’s current economic woes: “If anyone out there has a better recipe, I want to hear it. Seriously. But I want them to explain it to me using numbers”.
  • “In Brussels, the capital of the European Union, they’re trying to make the city become an example of anti-vulture fund legislation. You know what, Argentines? We planted that flag in the world. No one talked about this before. We gave a name to international usury”. Well, yes. That one is true. When the law is unfair, sometimes you have to change the law. Or break it, like we did here, because it just didn’t feel right.

See you at the next Cadena.