Skip to main content

Paul McCartney Doesn’t Want Choripán Sold At His Shows

By | [email protected] | May 11, 2016 6:22pm


So word on the street is that Sir Paul McCartney, who is touring our turf, doesn’t want choripan to be sold during intermission of his concert in Cordoba on Sunday. In fact, he doesn’t want any meat sold in or around the premises of his show. Leading us to wonder – has he lost his mind?

An open letter to Sir Paul McCartney:

Paul, darling, babe. Please listen up. We know that you are a devout vegetarian and we salute you. We also know that meat-eating is harmful to the planet and we know that it is harmful to the animals; may they rest in peace. But you just cannot deprive the people of this nation of their post-concert snack, especially not the choripán, the mighty, juicy choripán. Because instead of walking away from your performance tweeting the lyrics to your songs with a crowd selfie attached to it, they will be tweeting about the fact that they couldn’t have their chori and that’s just not the sort of publicity you want. They’ll be sneaking them in in aluminium foil anyway so you may as well let them start that parilla.

And what about the asadores? Where are they meant to sell their bifes and their choris? The whole town will be watching you. This country is already suffering enough from inflation and insufficient salary increases. These chorizo sandwiches need to be sold for the economy to grow.

Depriving an Argentine of their chori is like depriving Sarah Palin from having an opinion on everything. This country is synonymous with meat. It is a daily necessity, a staple food. Argentina is carne-coma heaven and you just turned it into hell. Plus, chimichurri surely can’t go well with tofu.

Think about it, Paul. Do you really want to take those little sausages of fat and delight away from the concert experience? You know how they say “you are the jam to my peanut butter” well choripán and good times work the same.