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The Beast Needs To Feast: Obama’s Car Fills Up In Retiro And Causes Social Media Storm

By | [email protected] | March 22, 2016 12:05pm

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We’ve yet to see the man himself, but already Porteños and those of us who dream of reaching their ranks are losing our collective shit over a sighting of US President Barack Obama’s car getting gas in Retiro.

It’s yet to be confirmed whether the car is a diesel or, as we all suspect, a petrol model.

Cadillac One, or “The Beast” as she’s affectionately known, is considered one of the most secure vehicles in the world – bomb proof, fully armored and even resistant to nuclear and chemical attacks. Hell, it even comes with four burly men to escort you around.

“POTUS’ ‘Beast’ filling up at noon on Libertador and Cerrito, plus 4 security vans.”

Not only all that, but the glass is bullet proof, the car carries rocket propelled grenades, night vision optics, tear gas cannons and vials of the President’s blood. Oh, and no one knows how to open the doors, bar a few CIA operatives. So that might make you feel a bit better the next time you misplace your keys, because at least opening the door to your Toyota Corolla isn’t a closely guarded State secret. Even the President isn’t immune to a child lock, apparently.

It isn’t impervious though, as we can see here, since a small bump is enough to stop it dead in its tracks.

He’s even got two Beasts to boot, the second being imaginatively named Cadillac Two. Oh, and four heavily armored helicopters ominously called Black Hawks, which could be seen hovering over the Capital yesterday.

“Other image of the 4 Black Hawks now above the Capital.”

The whole shebang is a huge operation for the United States Secret Service, which is making sure every detail and aspect of Obama’s State visit is wrapped in cotton wool – margin for error, there is not.

President Obama arrives tonight at Ezeiza Airport and has a packed schedule during his time here, before going to the Patagonian town of San Carlos de Bariloche on the 24th to rest with his family.