It’s Friday again!

Hi, you there with the tired eyes and the inactive brain. Just make a final effort and try to stay awake for a few more hours. It’s sunny outside and it looks like we’ll have a warm weekend in anticipation of spring.

Which reminds me: If you’re going to celebrate Spring Day on Monday, make sure you avoid the Palermo parks, unless you want to run into a bunch of drunk Millennials and Gen Zers fighting each other to see who gets to run this country in the future (spoiler alert: it’s the Gen Zers.)

This is what you need to know, in (almost) tweet form:

  • Things are still messed up in Tucumán and it’s not looking good. A provincial court decided to annul the gubernatorial elections after accusations of fraud and, since it is unlikely that they will be able to hold a second vote before October 29 (when the current governor leaves office), government officials are now threatening a federal intervention, which means that the federal government could be taking over the three branches of Tucumán’s government soon.
  • The PRO party is still dealing with its own mess after its leading congressional candidate in the Buenos Aires Province Fernando Niembro decided to resign after accusations of money laundering and overall corruption. Mauricio Macri, the party’s leader and presidential candidate, tried to defend Niembro by saying that at least he resigned, unlike other Kirchnerites who remain in office despite the many judicial cases pending over their heads. I mean, yeah but no. That doesn’t make it less terrible.
  • Supreme Court Judge Carlos Fayt announced this week that he’s quitting the Supreme Court on December 11, one day after Cristina leaves office. Fayt has been at war with Kirchnerism in the last few years, since government officials — the President included — argued that he was too old. His response was a big middle finger to everyone who questioned him.
  • Sure, things may be a lot better than in other areas of the world, but that doesn’t mean that we’re perfect. According to a recent study published in La Nación, we still don’t trust the US (because “they don’t care about us”) and we like China (because they bring money). We also feel “there are too many foreigners here” and Chinese, American, Paraguayan and Bolivian immigrants (in that order) are the ones we dislike the most. Hear that, Obama? Give us money and it’s all good. Signed, us.
  • There was a pretty big earthquake in Chile and people in Buenos Aires were freaking out about it since some tremors were felt here. Unfortunately, a disabled man died in the Greater Buenos Aires Area after falling down the stairs of his apartment building while he was trying to evacuate.
  • A video has surfaced in which a Tucumán policeman can be seen horribly abusing what seems to be a teenager. Even if he were not a teenager, nothing justifies this despicable display of police brutality.
  • There was also a cyanide spill in a Barrick Gold mine in San Juan. People were (understandably) not happy about it.
  • In insane news this week: the (absolutely insane) vice-principal of a high school in La Plata decided that the best way to commemorate the tragic Night of the Pencils was by doing like H. G. Wells and making her students believe that a coup was underway. She brought the students to the school yard and dramatically made the announcement (according to reports she even played an audio message by a Cristina impersonator asking for help), and told them that from now on they would have to wear a uniform to school. Because apparently, if a coup d’etat suddenly took place in Argentina, that would be the first thing you would be complaining about.

  • “You’re going to have to leave the country! So don’t complain!” she tells the students who are maybe laughing and/or crying. I know. Cray-cray. Although totally expected after years of trying to make us think that a coup is still totally possible these days.
  • Although here is some great news: starting this week, members of the LGBTQI community are finally able to donate blood without being treated like second-class citizens. And these are the things we should celebrate.
  • More good news! According to a recent report, the University of Buenos Aires is ranked first among Spanish-speaking countries in the region.
  • And speaking of weird things happening, a Reuters journalist allegedly assaulted an Economy Ministry staffer while Axel Kicillof was presenting the 2016 budget. Then turns out he hadn’t really assaulted her, only pushed her. Three days later, it’s still unclear what happened.
  • There’s a Rugby World Cup happening apparently, and Argentina is playing this Sunday so you should care about it. I guess.

Have a great weekend, kids!