Photo via Noticias

We “celebrated” Valentine’s day by looking up famous people who date, or have dated, Argentines. Get inspired by their tales of cross-cultural love to spark your own romance with a local – a world of heated political discussions, pet names and midnight dinners awaits you.

King Willem-Alexander of the Netherlands

Married: Máxima Zorreguieta Cerruti, aka Queen Máxima of the Netherlands

Photo credit: Wikipedia
The most Hello! thing ever. Photo credit: Wikipedia

King Willem-Alexander is married to Queen Maxima of the Netherlands, born Máxima Zorreguieta Cerruti in Buenos Aires in 1971. The pair apparently met at the Seville Spring Fair, where the then Prince coyly introduced himself as “Alexander.” When Máxima discovered that the round, red-cheeked blond man who kept visiting her at her Deutsche Bank office in New York was heir to the Dutch throne, she was reportedly quite surprised. Though the Dutch parliament went so far as to debate the appropriateness of their relationship (Máxima’s dad was Agricultural Minister during the bloody argentine military dictatorship of the 1970s), the girl from Recoleta managed to get the seal of approval from her mother in law, aka the Queen, who described her as an “intelligent, modern woman,” and the pair have been happily, royally married since 2002.

What are they doing this Valentine’s day? Wearing strange hats and posing with dogs and children for Hello! magazine.

Matt Damon

Married: Luciana Barroso

Matt Damon and Luciana Barroso
Matt Damon and Luciana Barroso

People describe their relationship as “inspiring”, basically because it’s endured (11 years and counting). The pair met in Miami Beach back in 2003 while Matt Damon was filming the Farrelly brothers comedy (remember them?) Stuck On You. Barroso was working as a waitress at a bar to finance her interior design studies, when Matt Damon and the film crew walked in. “I literally saw her across a crowded room, literally,” said Matt Damon in a literal fashion (is there a common metaphorical use of this expression?) Barroso was born in Salta in 1976, but there isn’t much more you can find out about her. Testament to this is the fact a common google search term is ‘Luciana Barroso speaking.’

What are they doing today? Something expensive, though they’ll tell the press they ‘stayed-in and ate pizza because we’re such homebodies’

Gael García Bernal

Dated: Dolores Fonzi

gael-garcia-bernal-et-dolores-fonzi

The man that became famous for playing Che Guevara in Motorcycle Diaries spent many years in the loving embrace of Argentine actress Dolores Fonzi, before things went south and the couple separated in 2014. Bernal and Fonzi met on the set of 2001 film Vidas Privadas (Private Lives) and they have two kids together, the epically-titled Lázaro and Libertad.

What are they doing today? Being incredibly good looking.

Michael Buble

Married: Luisana Lopilato

The Boob and the Loob
The Boob and the Loob

The Boob married model, actress and singer, Luisana Lopilato in March of 2011. Lopilato rose to fame in Rebelde Way – a telenovela set in the suggestively titled ‘Elite Way School’ – before really wiggling her way into the hearts and minds of her nation with her role in the Argentine equivalent of Married With Children. The couple has mansions sprinkled all over the globe, but one of them is in an exclusive gated community in weird, upscale “urban complex”  Nordelta, wrought from reclaimed swamp land in Tigre.

What are they doing today? Instagraming and kissing on medicine balls in their cavernous mansion.

Al Pacino

Dates: Lucila Polak

Photo via Noticias
Photo via Noticias

Al Pacino met Buenos Aires-born Lucila Polak at a dinner in LA, according to Caras magazine. Al Pacino, considered one of the greatest actors of the 20th century, is 40 years older and a fair bit shorter than the Argentine model and actress, which makes their relationship a match made in heaven. Last year, ‘Al’ came out to Argentina to deliver anecdotes and dance one or two steps of tango in ‘An Evening With Al Pacino.’ We are grateful for their relationship for the following:

Lucila Polak: ‘Al Pacino helped me play a lesbian.”

Screen Shot 2017-02-14 at 3.25.44 PM
From Caras magazine

Shakira

Dated: Antonio de la Rúa

Not in love
Not in love

This one didn’t end well. Shakira dated the Cordobés Antonio de la Rúa, a lawyer, publicist and former member of the “Sushi set” (a group of rich businessmen with a penchant for futomaki who allegedly influenced Argentine politics in the 90s) for about 11 years. De la Rúa is the son of former President Fernando de la Rúa, most famous for fleeing the Casa Rosada in 2001 in a helicopter, as the City boiled over with riots and looting because of a financial crisis.

Antonio claims he helped Shakira score a few key deals whilst acting as a kind of informal manager, and when their relationship ended, he filed a $250 million lawsuit against her to get his hands on some of her profits. Shakira successfully argued she was a self-made woman and the case was dismissed.

What are they doing for Valentine’s Day? Nothing, read the above.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Love, love, love etc

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